When I have the opportunity to wear what I want (which is usually limited to my days off from work), I’ve noticed that a lot of people compliment me on my sense of style. This always really surprises me, because I tend to dress pretty modestly.
I love wearing dresses. I didn’t always – in fact, for most of my elementary and middle school years, I refused to wear any dress except for my Irish dance costumes. But now that I’m older, I feel that there’s something really feminine and elegant about wearing a dress or skirt that is difficult to attain when wearing pants. That being said, it’s nearly impossible nowadays to find women’s clothing that leaves anything to the imagination, but if you keep your eyes peeled you can definitely find the occasional rare gem. I’ve managed to find modest dresses and skirts in places that might surprise you: Modcloth, Hot Topic, and Forever 21. Throw in the odd vintage piece from Etsy, and you’ve pretty much got my preferred wardrobe. I have a soft spot for 1950’s style dresses.
Here is my helpful hint for fashion:
No cleavage, fore or aft.
I’m not going to be the fashion police and tell people that they can’t wear what they want to wear, but there comes a point when what you’re wearing stops being attractive and becomes straight-up ridiculous. If your outfit for the day causes people to wonder, “Why bother wearing clothes at all?” then you may have gone too far. Having your bra completely showing or wearing a shirt so low-cut that boob slippage is almost guaranteed, means that shirt is too much (or maybe too little). It stops being flattering and attractive and definitely makes you look like you’re trying too hard. The same can be said for shorts, skirts and dresses: if your cheeks are showing (I don’t mean the ones on your face), then your clothes are definitely too short. That’s not a dress you’re wearing, it’s a shirt. Your outfit shouldn’t run the risk of getting you fined for public indecency.
It’s so much more feminine and attractive, in my personal opinion, when women dress classy, and in a way that flatters their figure without making them look like they can’t figure out how clothing works.
Now, I didn’t always think about dressing modestly, or that showing cleavage or legs wasn’t a good idea. In high school, I wore some lower-cut tops and short shorts and skirts because I wanted to feel sexy; I wanted guys to look at me and find me attractive. Unfortunately, my plan seemed to work. Even though I wanted to feel sexy and guys to think that I was beautiful, they definitely saw me as the sexy part rather than the beautiful. There’s a huge difference there. Thinking that someone is hot or sexy is only looking at them physically, what kind of body they have and whether or not – pardon my bluntness – you would want to have sex with them. That wasn’t the kind of attention I was truly looking for, but as a teenager that was the only attention I knew how to get.
You can be beautiful and attractive without showing a ton of skin. Part of it is how you dress, for sure – because how you dress shows how you feel about yourself and only adds to your general confidence. Some people say that women dress for men; others say that women dress for other women. I think either way, that’s the wrong motivation to put clothes on.
Marilyn Monroe may not be the perfect role model for how to live your life, but there is a quote attributed to her that I think hits the mark dead on: